Greetings to my one or two readers (mom & dad),

It is nearly 2 o'clock in the morning and I can't sleep. Not because I am depressed or anxious about what may or may not come of my future. But quite the contrary. I am happy and thrilled and thankful for what may or may not come of my future.

This past weekend I was working at a girl-friend's real estate firm to earn extra cash for new and spectacular headshots: (http://clients.peterhurley.com UserName: TWall Password: Photos). One of the lovely sales agents there, Erica, asked me to accompany her while she shows someone an under construction multi-million dollar Penthouse Apartment at another building. This led to a very random encounter with somone in the entertainment business. Someone who is rather high up in it. But even more bizarre was our connection to 9/11 and our survival experiences and losses. We exchanged numbers and talked quite a bit about this, and our new found appreciation of life, and our karmic duty to help our fellow man. Last week I was in a kind of funk and I couldn't figure out why. I know part of it was because I am still in a transitional phase in my life. I do not have the security of a full time job but mind you I have been finding ways to bring in a decent income --- LEGALLY [just in case someone from the FBI, CIA, IRS, NSA, NYPD, GLAD, MADD, NY Dept of Labor, or any other organization that can potentionally make my life a living hell - is reading this]. I do not have an acting job/audition lined up as of yet nor the comforts of a lovely woman to make the pain in my anquished, lonely soul go away...along with the pain in my balls.

So before you start going "WAAAAH wah waaaaaaa - cry me a river" - let me say I am over that. And life is funny like that. Peaks and Valleys. Time and again this happens and I have yet to stay calm during the valleys. No matter how bad things are, each day is a new day and you never know what's around the corner. A simple phone call can change the outcome of your entire life...put you on a path to success that you had no idea existed in all the moments before that fateful phone call. I am sure I am talking out of my ass right now. I don't care. Because I can't sleep. I need to write down all the things that people tell me I should be grateful for but I fail to see it for myself. For that I am ashamed. Who exactly do I thank for this though? God, Jesus, a guardian angel, the cosmos, fate, The Force, The Schwartz? I don't know so I will just thank away. Here it goes.

Thank you for Howard Stern's Radio Show. I would have lost my life on 9/11 had I not been listening to him that morning. I am happy to be alive.
Thank you for allowing me to grow up in such a wonderful family - but I am still neurotic and in need of therapy. Go figure.
I am thankful for such gorgeous, sweet nieces and nephews. Emily, Haley, Evan, Jeremy and Stephanie - you all rock!!
I am thankful for the fact that whenever I think I am about to go into the "red" financially, that random phone call would come and suddenly I have a job for quick and easy money. OR even a random residual check from an acting job i did a while back will pop up in the mail.
I am thankful for having such a great group of friends. The support from my closest friends from 1st grade is something that is incomprehensible. Undeniable. Unbreakable. They will be my friends to the grave.
I am thankful for my mentor/acting teacher/friend Joe Ross for lifting my spirits when I was having the most difficult times and he gave me the strength to keep moving forward with my aspirations.
I am grateful for my old boss, Charlie Cortese for his guidance and support and for simply being a bosses' boss while maintaining a true level of humanity - He sees no one as above or below him. A rare trait for someone of his social, corporate, and economic status.
I am thankful for my agent, Tracey Goldblum at Abrams Artists who has went above and beyond her job as my "commercial" agent. Tracey you rock. I am proud to be with Abrams Artists commercial department.
I am thankful for having such hardworking agressive managers at Atlantic Management. I feel there will come a time (hopefully soon) when my career will take a giant leap and large Theatrical agents will then be pursuing me rather than the other way around. As it should be. They will have to contend with Atlantic.
I am thankful for my path crossing with Darin Beckstead's - I believe in his talent as a filmmaker and he believes in mine as an actor. I am excited to be working with him again on a FEATURE film project this time.
I am thankful for my affordable apartment.
I am thankful for my parents beach house providing me a haven for when I need to escape the city.
I am thankful for my own personality and ambition and strength and fortitude that has helped me to stand tall and to keep on marching forward.
I am thankful of all my acting gigs that I have earned, most recently The Sopranos regardless of how small the part is. I am sure a million people would be glad to trade places with me to speak those lines on that show.
I am happy that I live in the greatest city in the world.
I am happy I am healthy and I have all of my limbs.
I am happy to be alive and I am happy that my family and relatives are all healthy and alive.
I am happy that I have gardian angels that seem to keep providing me with exactly what I need at specific moments in my life.
And MOST of all, I am happy I am finally starting to fall asleep. I am sure whoever reads this, will probably fall asleep if they haven't already by this point. Consider this blog A Literary Ambien - with a dash of Paxil dust. Goodnight.